Different kinds of Chicago CTA Buses:

1. Stinky Bus – This is the bus in June thru Aug

2. Influenza Bus – This is bus rest of year

3. Horse Nostril Bus – This is bus when it’s raining and the windows are all fogged up with condensation from people breathing too much

4. WinterMint Bus – Bus when homeless guy is drinking Scope to get drunk, this one is pleasant actually

5. The North Face Bus – This is the Clark bus, can also be called: Angry Birds, iPad or the Trust Fund Bus.

6. Sardines Bus – This is the bus that someone is eating sardines on. (not what you thought I was going to say huh, hahah gotcha).

7. McDonalds Bus - This is the bus someone is eating McDonalds on and even though you have a personal embargo on eating things that will kill you, you smell the French fries and then feel shameful that you want to eat them so badly...

8. Sports Bus - This is the bus that everyone on is going to the sports game and you are not. You are like Rudolf the red nosed reindeer and not invited... or basically like my elementary school experience in gym class

9. Pee Bus - This is the bus when # 4 has drank too much Scope or #8 and his buddies have done to many shotguns of Coors Lite and well you know what happens... it starts small and then gets bigger and bigger down one or both legs...